It turned out it was not my wife but my neighbours wife and that I had gone into the wrong house. Thus I had inadvertantly broken one of the ten commandments at least on some subconscious freudian level. I had coveted my neighbours wife without realizing. This is in fact a breach of 2 commandments if you are cheauvanistic enough to think that a woman can be a posession... look it up for yourself. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ten_Commandments
you may find yourself in a beautiful house.
you may find yourself arrested for waking up in your neighbours house.
Of course, although breaking into someone elses house is illegal it is not one on the don't do list. neither is taking crack or heroin. so Downey Jr is going to heaven.
Looking at the ten commandments, if you are not paying attention you could end up fucked and not following any of them. Like if you tune into the wire from episode 3 of the 4th series... and the first commandment is confusing. It essentially says 'I am your god'. Which isn't a commandment at all, its more of a statement, making the ten commandments banner redundent and thus making them difficult to follow.
For example, it is because of this that I don't keep the sabbath day holy but make an effort to sacrifice goats to satan and listen to black sabbath backwards.
but only on a sunday.
Don't take the lords name in vain? who doesn't? seriously?
Don't covet. twice? God is clutching at straws.
It is becoming quite clear that the ten commandments don't really have much to do with todays society. I mean everyone kills things these days.
everyone who uses domestos breaks the 7th rule of fight club.
Go into a hotel without taking the soap? you've not broken the 8th commandment.
Swingers? you're going to hell
(try typing in swingers club on a pic search. it gets very ugly very quickly.)
We all have days when we're annoyed with our parents.
but Josef Fritzls daughter had more reason than some to not send her own father to prison. however for much of her teen and early adult life she 'honoured' her father almost nightly apparently, although technically because he was married it was considered adultary. So ironically by adhering to one commandment she broke another. Isn't that ironic?
Dont'cha think?
Sleeping with your own children isn't considered a breaking of the commandments and Abrahams nephew Lot actually slept with all 9 of his daughters after they got him drunk. No mention of the moral implications in Genesis at all, it is up to us as God fearing Christians to interpret it as being bad. This is getting complicated we have to think for ourselves AND follow these strict rules.
All in all I am pretty sure that although the commandments are outdated there are several of them which are still relevant today and we should stick to some of them, although I am going to leave you to guess for yourselves which ones they should be.
Point is, she eventually accepted that it was a misunderstanding and that our front doors look very similar, the police call was cancelled and we all laughed about it the following week.
It was like at the end of thundercats when snarf says something stupid.
You can download the 10 commandments ap on I-tunes for only 79p thus keeping yourself from the gates of hell in the modern age.
