Tom hanks dealt with it by writing messages to himself on a wall and drawing a picture on a ball which he named wilson which in all honesty is a vicious piece of cynical product placement.
Another way of dealing with loneliness is to hack off your own limbs...
Like what James Franco did when he spent 127 hours alone.
Or divorcing your parents and befriending Michael Jackson ala McCauley Culkin.
Because being alone doesn't make you weird.
However films are not to be believed. I'm pulling the rug from under you, making you accept that there are only 3 ways to act if being alone. Millions of people have been alone forever. so many people have been alone that they have made words for them like Spinster, which is the name of a woman who is alone, the fact that there is a word for a female lonely old person probably means there is a word for a lonely old man, but I don't know it and can't be bothered to look it up.
Fortunately I'm not on my own for that long just a few days. So what am I going to do whilst being alone?
Watch films maybe.
I could even take up a new sport, like vomiting, or stalking, I could write a blog.
Part of the problem here is that this is actually a re-edit of an unfinished blog from a very long time ago, so I will not be on my own, either tomorrow or in the foreseeable future. In fact I have been trying to get into the headspace of a man who is about to be left alone, and all I can think of is that I over analyze song lyrics, but not any song lyrics, one particular set of song lyrics which pop up in several different songs.
May I introduce to you 'A Thief in the Night'. A completely overused metaphor in pop songwriting. A biblical reference from Thesolonians 5.24.
So Take That- Re-light my fire.
Not originally by them but by dancey gay dude Dan Hartman, In this song Hartman metaphorically uses theives in the night, ones that took away the love that he knew. I'm not into using this as a metaphors, not when there are actually real life theives in the night.
Hot Chip Thieves in the Night.
These guys have big kahunas to actually use this as a title, but at the very least they don't insult our intelligence asking us to compare a thief in the night to someone taking away love that we knew, instead Alexis Taylor tells us something about his mother told him when he was young, something so right. "She said to take care for thieves in the night". I completely empathise with this. My mum often told me that if I misbehaved that a man would come and take me away. No indication as to where, or when, just that he would, so happy with this one.
Alphabeat- 10000 nights of thunder.
Absolute shite, back to a metaphorical use, where:
"You came like a thief in the night and stole my heart". The next line is something to do with the fact that medically it is impossible to survive if someone has physically removed the heart from the body so the singer of Alphabeat asphixiated because his blood had no oxygen being pumped around the body.
Kings of Tomorrow- Finally
Metafuckingphors. I want them to stop now, they're not big and not clever, although, this person is simply "unanounced, like a thief in the night." Which I suppose is not so bad, I guess Thieves don't like to be announced at any time of the day, let alone at night, when they are most likely to steal things.
but no, the metaphors continue thick and fast...
Kiss- Thief in the night
Like a thief in the night - she breaks into his heart
Like a thief in the night
Like a thief in the night - she never leaves her mark
Like a thief in the night - alright, alright
Breaking into someones heart must be the most pointless exercise there is, the only thing you'll find in there is muscle tissue, cartlidge and blood, fuckloads of blood.
although on the plus side...Who'd have thought to rhyme Night with Alright? clever eh?
Not sure who is about to break into who's heart, perhaps they should all just go home and forget that they ever met, I mean what are kiss and Lewis hamilton doing in the same picture? is it real, even if it isn't someone must have imagined them together, perhaps there are people out there whose obsession is picking unlikely groups of people to photoshop together, where as mine is simply unpicking the lyric 'like a thief in the night' from various songs.
This is why I should never be left alone, Or more precisely its why my dog shouldn't be left alone, because he just sleeps through the day and keeps me up at night, stopping me from sleeping... stealing hours and hours of sleep from me... If only I could find a suitable metaphor for the dog that steals hours of sleep from me... if I had all my functions then I'd probably have no trouble.
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