Something smells rotten in Denmark.

Today When I came home from work I found a massive shit in the middle of my floor with a dog standing next to it. There is, of course, no evidence to suggest that my dog did the shit so I had no choice but to let it go. The situation I was in did remind me of the MI6 analyst who was found dead locked inside a bag in London. I found the situation quite strikingly similar. The only thing that would have made the situations more alike would have been if instead of a poo, I found MI6 analyst locked inside a bag in my flat, and if instead of my flat I was inside the house of MI6 analyst Gareth Williams, and I was a landlady. Don't get me wrong, I am not saying Gareth Williams was a poo, but nevertheless, the lack of evidence that my dog did the poo resonates with the fact that there is little evidence that Gareth Williams was murdered.



This is a job for Columbo.

Obviously I am more interested in getting to the bottom of the case of Mr Williams than of a poo in the middle of the floor. I am looking through every possibility.

Possibility 1.

Gareth Williams came home where he slipped on a banana skin that a rogue swarm of chimps left lying around, in the confusion, the lock for Gareths bike, became loose and slipped out of his hand landing on the bag that Mr Williams slipped into and inadvertently locking itself. Williams was so tired that he fell asleep and asphyxiated. Probability 9/10.

Possibility 2.

Williams was 'glamoured' by a character from the TV series 'True Blood', and was convinced to go hime and somehow lock himself in the bag and asphyxiate himself whilst spreading 20,000 worth of designer womens fashion about his bedroom. Probability 9.5/10

Possibility 3.

After a bad day at work Mr Williams killed himself using a strange self bagging system used only by ancient Mayans and an advanced civilization of robots from the future. Except he forgot the english language, and worked out a language using female designer clothes to form an elaborate suicide note that only he understands. Probability 50/50

Seeing is there is little evidence that Murdered MI6 analyst Gareth Williams was murdered, I would like to put forward these 3 probabilities as possible reasons why Gareth Williams was found in a locked bag in his flat in Pimlico, London.

I am available for weddings, Christenings and Bah Mitzvahs to solve any mysteries.

Elementary, dear Watson.