Manmachine201's guide to redressing the balance.

Bliar (how fucking coutercultural am I?!) has announced that today all his profits from his book 'journey'- about a man who became prime minister, overspent, went to war 3 times and fucked it all up- will go to fixing up broken soldiers blown up in the war. This was met with a cynical reaction implicating him in a huge tax break. He swiftedly reacted by going one stage further and resurecting all the British soldiers who died in Kosovo, Iraq and Afghanistan from the dead. He will no doubt perform this miraculous feat on top of Harrowdown hill where Dr David Kelly was found having commited suicide and not murdered.





Blairs gesture has recieved a mixed reaction among the victims of of the wars.




Blair doesn't give a shit because thanks to his charitable donation he saves 2.3 million a year from tax breaks, and has been given a formula made from dead Iraqi children's blood to make him young again forever, Dorian grey style.

Anyway, maybe its his own way of redressing the balance.



A way I will redress the balance is by retorting to a Tory Lobbyist who cut me down on twitter the night after the general election. I am shit at working Twitter so I only found out the other day. It was an insult so cutting that it took me 3 months to realize it had even happened. It was like the scene in kill Bill where Beat**ce cuts the top of Lucy Liu's head off. She almost didn't realize it happened because the sword was so sharp, and in a similar case I didn't realize that a Tory lobbyist had cut the top of my head off with the sharpness of her wit.



I got the above picture by typing 'door stable bolted horse' in a search engine.

When it became clear that the Conservatives were going to get back into power I tweeted...

manmachine201
#ukelection #libcon AAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGH! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! MUMMMYY!!! ARRRRRRGH! ARRRRRRRRRRRgh! AAAAAARRRRGH!!!!

Which is fair enough seeing as the last time they were in power we were fucked. the UK manufacturing was reduced to a cottage industry, it was a government that supported South American dictators with a blatent disregard for human rights in Pinnochet, etc, lots of thing were wrong with the last Tory government. It was also the Conservatives who initially gave bankers such widespread powers which fucked our ecconomy.

TennConserv said: The only resistance a Labour supporter can offer is a belly ache noise.

This is wrong in several ways.

1) I am not a labour supporter. I proved that by misspelling Blair Bliar earlier in the blog.

2) That was not the noise of a belly ache but the noise of panic at the prospects of liars who will let the poor suffer at the expense of big business getting power.

3) It wasn't a noise, it was typing.

But facts have never been as important as spin to the tories so we can't really hold it against them.

So thats that cleared up. I'm obviously at the losing end because Cameron is still prime minister even though I don't recognise him as my nations leader, but at least I got to reply albeit 4 months late due to my lack of skill in utilizing my twitter account in a way that leaves me sharp and ready for war. A bit like the wars in Aghanistan and Iraq really. If the previous government used sharp wit on the Taliban and Saddam in twitter attacks with effective use of hashtags, then perhaps Dr David Kelly's inquest might not be happening now. Still if Bliar is giving away his fortune and raising all English people from the dead killed by the war, then all is forgiven.

Of course he shouldn't be expected to bring back any Iraqi's or Afghans because they are horrible Arabs and the enemy, the less of them the better.

But there is still a balance to be redressed. With Wyclef Jean running for presidency of Haiti, there is one more politician and one less Fugee. The only way to fix this is for Barrack to get in the Studio with Pras Michele and Lauren Hill. So what if Hill is in some mental cult and popping out Marleys faster than Rita ever could, So what if Pras's only notable success was Ghetto Superstar



How many times are you gonna run for President? 1 time... 2 times.

Anymore loose ends that need tapering?